If you’ve ever suffered from “imposter syndrome” in any aspect of your journey as a professional leader, you know how debilitating it can be.
Sadly, imposter syndrome is amplified by the power of social media. #lovehaterelationship
Let’s be honest…
Not everything you see on social media is an accurate representation of the truth.
Don’t believe me…take a look at this post “memory” from six years ago.
July 12, 2013 marked the sixth “monthaversary” of Ed and my wedding day…
To celebrate the occasion on social media, I proclaimed “time flies when your having a blast.”
At the time of this post, I had a highly visible professional leadership role in my community. On the surface, everyone thought I had my act together.
To quote Maury Povich, as he reads a polygraph test results, “that is a lie”!
Underneath the surface, s#!t was falling apart.
#truthbetold I. Was. Miserable.
Not because my new husband was terrible. In fact, he was a total champ in handling the “emotional roller coaster” he just married.
I was miserable because I was living a double life.
In one “life”, I was this rockstar leader who had a cute little family and was envied for all the delicious dinners my husband made for me (again, thanks to social media for allowing me to share #foodporn pictures).
The other life, I was self-medicating with “comfort-food-while-sipping-pinot-grigio” and wasting my life purpose away by watching whatever trash reality television show was popular at the moment.
And, how I covered up my “imposter syndrome” symptoms was to focus on everybody else’s problems, except my own. I was also really good about going above and beyond to make people happy, just so I could prove to the world, I was valuable.
So much so, I barely had anytime to discover what made me happy.
And, I had been living that way for a looooooong time. Like, twenty-plus years, long time.
About a week after I shared this “social media” post, I officially hit “rock bottom”…
And, when you’re perceived as someone who’s got everything together, the “rock bottom” highlight reel never gets blasted on social media.
Thankfully, as soon as I recognized my dire situation, I also said (out loud) “I can’t get out of this mess…I need help!”
“Help” show up, two hours later in the form of another social media post to “win tickets to a life mastery weekend workshop”.
I got the tickets. Convinced Ed to go with me. And, made a commitment to start turning my life around.
In order to uphold my commitment, that meant I had to commit to another way of doing things.
I rearranged my schedule.
I nourished my body differently.
I took time to define what I wanted.
I stopped jumping to conclusions or worst case scenarios.
I released the expectation to be perfect and start showing the real me.
In other words, I took the time to fix the root of why my life was broken, instead of trying to slap a band-aid on it, hoping it would get better.
And, doing the “self-work” was the ONLY way to achieve success in my relationships with other people, finances, career and faith.
Taking on this commitment to remove my imposter tendencies wasn’t a cake walk, either. I ain’t gonna lie, it was a messy process to work through. But, I’m glad I stuck through it.
Within four months, I felt and looked healthier.
Within a year, my marriage and finances better than ever.
Within 18 months, I was able to leave my full time job to start my own company.
What does this mean for you?
Well, if you are a professional leader that can relate to any aspect of my story, here are some things you can do to turn your situation around:
Journal your thoughts daily
Evaluate what you’re spending your time on
Mind your food and exercise
Get to the root of why you feel like you have to be perfect or why you jump to conclusions
Stop focusing on what you don’t what and get clear about what you “SPECIFICALLY” want
Flash forward to today…sure, there are plenty messy moments that have happened (personally and professionally) since my commitment to making changes.
What gets me through the messy moments (or when I feel “imposter syndrome” creeping back in) are the tools and techniques I have learned to help me navigate these moments with confidence.
I gave you some ideas of where you can start to handle your own imposter syndrome symptoms, but if you what to dive deeper into this stuff, so you can finally create a lasting transformation for your life, career, health, relationships, finances and faith…
I can guide you from where you are to where you want to go. But, you’ve got to want your transformation more than I want it for you,
If you feel like imposter syndrome rules your life, you can’t afford NOT to do something about it.
Ready to make epic s#!t happen for you business and life? Let’s talk. I guarantee, after our chat, you’ll know your next best steps to take, in order to get the results you desire.
Do. Have. Be!
P.S. If you’re wondering what I have to say about my marriage on my six and a half years anniversary…
“Time flies when you are committed to being a better version of yourself. I am grateful to have a supportive partner to walk this journey with me, messy parts and all!”